Dwindling Hope...

Hey Blogland 

So today is my 17 month transplant-list-aversary. In all honesty I'm losing a bit of hope when it comes to actually getting my call, it just seems that as soon as you hit a certain point you kind of just assume it will never happen. I kind of just see it as a sad fact of life at this point, but for as long I continue to breathe I will have some hope remaining. 

The problem is the longer I wait the more I think that those of us waiting for both Heart and Lungs are definitely at the bottom of a very deep pile. I haven't heard of anyone having both in a while and the more time that passes that you don't hear of people having both the more any remaining hope you have just drips away. I know I'm being a tad depressing today but I'm sure once today is out of the way my positivity will bounce back. It's just today is one big massive reminder of how long I've been waiting and how it may never happen, and it's a little annoying that there is physically nothing I can really do about it, it's in the hands of strangers whom I have never met.  

My channel 4 thing goes out on Monday by the way at 7:55pm, I'm a little worried my point of view may have come across a bit skewed because I'm not the biggest advocate for the opt out system that Wales have just implemented. Don't get me wrong I think it is potentially a great idea but at the moment we don't know the strictness of it and how affectively it will run, I'm a bigger advocate of getting people to talk to their families. I think the main problem I have with the opt out system is that if a son/daughter died and they hadn't talked to their family about what they wanted and their family was firmly against taking any of their organs and they still took them that would force a lot of people to opt out We just don't know exactly how it will run yet. I just have a few reservations about it, thats all. Therefore the reason I'm a little worried about my point of view coming across a bit skewed is that I babble when I talk and I find it hard to get what I'm saying across without seeming like a idiot lol. Hopefully it'll be good though no matter what :)

     chat soon guys


  1. Awww, sweetie, I feel for you, without pitying you. I can't imagine, how I'd feel. It's good your being open and honest about your feelings, that's always a positive thing. And even though your feelings are completely understandable, just know that there's always hope and we're all here to support you.

  2. Aw hun I really don't know what to say and cannot imagine how you feel, though I am proud that you always are so honest about your feelings and you don't hide them. I do have my fingers crossed that 'that' call does come through for you xx

    Beautyqueenuk xx

  3. Don't lose hope chick, I know it's really hard but try and stay positive. Always keeping my fingers crossed for you that "the call" will come soon!


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