20.10.13

18 months on...

Hey Blogland, 

LOVE YOU GUYS!! | Source  
So today marks exactly 18months since I was placed on the the transplant list. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. It's been a long old 18 months and it feels much longer because it's actually 2 and half years since the whole transplant thing got fully underway for me so it makes it feel so much longer because even though it took a year to get on the list during that whole process it was definitely a similar feeling to actually being on the list.

It's a bit annoying because if I had, had my transplant with my first false alarm I would be 5 and half months post transplant right now and then if I had, had my transplant on my second false alarm I could be writing to you letting you know how I was getting on right now. Obviously there was a reason that it just wasn't meant to be those times and I accept that but I can't help wonder where I would be if they had actually happened then. 

I suppose the main, wonderful thing that has happened and come out of me being on the list is that I have made some absolutely amazing friends while on it. I can honestly say that I have made some life long friends through this whole transplant thing. They understand things when others just really can't, not because they don't want to, because they really want to, but because they have never experienced it and can't really fully appreciate or get it. It's a bit like if someone were to talk to me about giving birth, I can understand to an extent but I'll never be able to fully appreciate what it is that a mother has to do/go through to give birth to something. It's just the way it is if you know what I mean. I'm so pleased I have the transplant friends that I do they've really helped me in the past 18 months and especially in the past few weeks after my mini freak outs after the latest false alarm they've really helped me come to terms and get to grips with what I'm going to have to go through when I eventually get my transplant and I love them all for that :)

So I suppose I kind of dedicate this post to all my wonderful friends, whom I would not know if it weren't for the fact that we all need/needed of have had loved ones who need/have needed transplants. It's my silver lining through to this whole situation :D 

As much as it's annoying to still be waiting I'm so thankful that I'm still here because the past 18 months I have watched far to many who didn't make it and didn't get their calls in time and I really do know that I could be far worse off than I am. I'm lucky that I get to be at home and not waiting in a hospital. I'm still lucky enough that I can get around and I'm not restricted to a wheelchair albeit with the lowest exercise tolerance ever lol. I can still go to work even if it is for 1 day and I'm so grateful for all these little things because I really do understand that I could be far worse off than I am. 

So hopefully I won't be waiting too much longer but if I am hopefully I will stay nice and stable :)  

Chat soon guys 

4 comments:

  1. I really hope the next call is the one sweetie xx

    Beautyqueenuk xx

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  2. I hope the next time you get that call, it's the right one!

    You're doing so well - I don't know how I would be able to be half as positive as you are, everytime I read your blog I come away with a new sense of inspiration.

    Hmm maybe...

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  3. i hope you don't have to wait too long now, hang in there!

    Leyla xx
    mythoughtsandboredom.blogspot.co.uk

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  4. Hi Stacie i think you are amazing, you are so young and have already/are going through so much with your health and emotionally. It must be so hard at times yet you have such an awesome, positive attitude :) i really respect that. I think the face that you are keeping this blog is really cool. I hope that you get that call very soon hun xxx

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